Before you read my posts, please forgive me for my bad grammar. And inconsistent pronoun, for sometimes I use "aku" and sometimes I use "saya", it depends on my mood and the post. Some of them are in English and some in Malay language. And the pictures in this blog mostly from google images. Btw, thanks for stopping by here.
Fuhh. Today is already 30th of May. And one day left to welcome June. Two days of this week are scheduled for my laboratory exam which is Parasitology and Microbiology and my Skill Lab exam. Hope I will do them well.
Somehow i realize, i have become more and more lazy by days. but in the same time, i keep trying to get to the top. well, maybe i'm not strong enough that i will fall sometimes in my way up! not to lie, i envy my friends that are consistent in their study, and i wanna be like them too, just in the ways of study.
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p/s ::: Happy birthday to Amalina Husna, my sweet, doctor-to-be friend =))
Ahad yang down. Ibu telefon pagi tadi, sempat cakap dengan opah je, line XL wat hal macam sengal, tak sempat cakap dengan tok. sedih, rindu tok dan opah. bila bosan, dan lapar tapi belum tiba masa lunch, bukak kerepek melantak setengah, sambil tengok gambar-gambar cacing. kalau dulu buat macam ni, rasa nak muntah loya la segala bagai tapi sekarang dah lali, dah sebati. sebab setiap masa pun kena tengok gambar cacing, gambar bakteria dan sedara-mara mereka. rindu jugak pada ngak, balik la dari kampung cepat-cepat. ah, abaikan.
Let me walk away from you. Let me go from you. Let me find my life, alone. Don't ever bother me. Let us take two different path. And find the meaning of life, ourself, not depending on each other. Because you always decide for me. Until I've become a not independent girl. It's hard you know. Maybe I will fall down a few times at the beginning. But I'll try and keep trying to become strong enough so that you know that I don't need you in my life, anymore. Please don't lend me your hand in every situation although at my very hard times. Please let me become strong and independent girl. Please, I beg to you. For the first time, and the last time, MAYBE. I don't want people keep laughing at me for hold on you each seconds. Please DREAM, let me go, and create space for myself in this world.
When i lost the inspiration, i lost everything. mood. success. happy. smile. laugh. everything. And i fear, my life would change too. And for exchange to that, i gain something. something i dont ever want, ever dream. sad. tears. loneliness. lack-self-confidence. Maybe, i should work harder to get myself inspired again.
Maybe. Maybe.
and there is this saying said by some people, friends of us reflect the actual of us.
right now, just wondering what will happen. keep feeling down, down and down. without knowing the actual reasons. without ever trying to get up again. but just daydreaming about a better feeling, yes! keep dreaming and dreaming. until when? wake up!!!! the world need you, yes, for real.
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Walking, keep walking, walk and walk again until the muscles get tired itself. Talking, keep talking, talk and talk and talk until the mouth shut itself. i just wonder why certain people born to be a friendly one and certain people are not. why those people easy to mix with people without feeling shy or not confident? ahah, maybe that's because Allah create variety of people so that this world, be a colorful world. i need to improve my communication skill, though i'm not the friendly type of person.
*what am i just trying to say here?*
* IDK myself, done writing crap, now time to review medicine material"
" good morning to everybody as it is already 3:30 am in da morning here at Jakarta"
"i miss Malaysia so much, and i'm homesick too!!!!"
How can i'm not realize all the mistakes i have done. yes, i just keep thinking, doing it as a fun, to relax myself from getting stress over the heavy material but it is a sin! by looking on people, different sex, different world. and actually i get nothing, at all. Astaghfirullahalazim, how small i am to Him. and how small my knowledge about Islam.... |
"And be patient, for indeed, Allah does not allow to be lost the reward of those who do good." [11:115]
- Malay saying : " buat baik berpada-pada, buat jahat jangan sekali "
- good things are meaningless unless you do with sincerity
- always hold on the fate that Allah will pay you for your doing, bad or good, late or now, but never
- when you make promises, make sure you do your words, once you broke it, it is hard to people believe you again
- when people trust you to keep their privacy, they are mean so
- ask for people forgiveness when we make mistake to human and ask for Allah's if we make mistake to Him as Allah always forgive His man that truly repent
and this is the reason why someone should not trying take their life after being dump, or doing something stupid. and the best and perfect reason is because Allah knows he/she is not the perfect one for you. accept the fate and move on with your beauty life. never look back at the same person, and should you love he/she so much, one day, if it is your destiny, you will find your love again.
"O mankind, fear your Lord, who created you from one soul and created from it its mate and dispersed from both of them many men and women. And fear Allah, through whom you ask one another, and the wombs. Indeed Allah is ever, over you, an Observer." [4:1]
"Sesiapa yang keadaan usahanya semata-mata berkehendakkan kehidupan dunia dan perhiasannya (dengan tidak disaksikan sama oleh Al-Quran tentang sah batalnya), maka Kami akan sempurnakan hasil usaha mereka di dunia dan mereka tidak dikurangkan sedikitpun padanya. Merekalah orang-orang yang tidak ada baginya pada hari akhirat kelak selain daripada azab Neraka dan pada hari itu gugurlah apa yang mereka lakukan di dunia dan batallah apa yang mereka telah kerjakan." [Surah Hud 11:15-16]
Dapatkan Mesej Bergambar di Sini
nak buat baik pada orang memang payah, tambah lagi jika melibatkan situasi di mana kita harus melepaskan barang yang kita sayang. tapi buat baik haruslah dengan niat yang benar, bukan mengharapkan balasan. dalam erti kata lain, IKHLAS. bila dah niat nak buat baik tu, teruskan je walaupun ada halangan lain, tapi kalau niat nak buat jahat, baik lupakan walaupun jalan terbuka luas. kadang-kadang bila kita buat baik, orang perli, kutuk atau yang lebih teruk, ambil kesempatan. ada juga yang balas dengan kejahatan. banyak kot, bukan kadan-kadang. tapi, tanam dalam diri, itu semua dugaan dan jangan pernah menyesal dengan kebaikan yang kita lakukan dengan seikhlas mungkin sebab semua yang kita lakukan dengan niat kerana Allah dan ikhlas, insya-Allah dapat balasan yang lebih besar dan bermakna, iaitu pahala.
"berbuat baik berpada-pada, buat jahat jangan sekali"
this block, i learn about human's skin and integument. yeah, i admit that it's kinda tough subject but i have to learn it anyway. yesterday, i got microbiology lab examination and alhamdulillah it went well, although not very well as i want it to happen. and today, i have another exam that is skill lab, where i can practice on checking up patient's skin abnormality in real life as doctor, soon. instead of real patient, we will practice among us, and all we have to check is hand skin, hair, nail and we need to memorise the anatomy of skin.
and still, i wake up in these hours after take a quick sleep for 3 hours for revising on the examination check-list we receive. *puhhhh... and tomorrow is my big paper in this block before parasitology lab paper on Saturday morning. pray for me, tq.
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p/s :: people who work harder will get a very good outcome instead of people who doesn't make their sweat out from the sweat pore but keep dreaming of a good result.
keep going on. dont ever step back. dont give up. stay consistent with our things. and that's it, we get what we want, either now or later, it doesnt matter as people always want more in life....
